I know, I know, its been like three weeks. I apologize.
Two Saturdays in a row I was on a plane for my Spring Break; last week I was just tired and forgot.
But I'm back.
And still tired.
State testing is upon us, which means that we are busily trying to show our students that the skills they've learned all year are actually the same ones on the test; even though they look completely different. As a teacher, I hate state testing. This is only my second year of teaching, and I hate it. I have far more hope that my students will perform well this year than I did last year, but I still hate it. Those things are not at all an accurate measure of my students and what they are capable of.
But I digress; this blog is supposed to be about writing, not education policies.
I made it a point during my Spring Break to read; one of my layovers was four hours, so I made sure to have a good, thick book with me. I brought the Lord of the Rings trilogy, conveniently all in one book. As I was reading, I remembered why J.R.R. Tolkien was one of my writing inspirations. The words that he used are so vivid, so precise. I can see how he used his knowledge of history to create a new history. Most of my stories take place in different worlds that I've invented, so I understand the need to have a history to give the world an anchor to what the audience already knows and understands.
One day last week, I was driving home from school and was hit with a blast of inspiration, like I hadn't had in years. I came straight in the house and began writing for about 45 minutes straight; at the end, I'd nearly finished a short story. I realized then something that had been absent from my writing preparation: reading! A good writer always reads; I think that my lack of time for reading lately has impacted my writing. We'll have to remedy that.
While grading earlier today and thinking about getting these kids ready for testing, I thought how insufficient one test is to just someone's ability in anything. Some of my kids are masterful writers; however, catch them on a bad day, and you'd think that they couldn't write anything. Even as I compare their writing from the beginning of the year until now, I see how unfair it would be to judge them on work that they did in September compared to now.
By the same token, I can't judge myself on writing that I did when I was just starting as a writer. It's been 14 years (gasp) since I've started writing, and I've only continued to perfect my craft. One of my best friends was helping me to edit the last novel that I completed (back in 2009) and I was constantly cringing and moaning at mistakes I made. My best friend, however, kept telling me "don't forget, you've grown so much since then. Besides that, you have a really solid foundation in this story! You've just got to tighten it up, fine - tune it."
I'm still fine-tuning, I realized. Will it ever be to my satisfaction? Probably not. But as long as I have friends who encourage me, and who realize that sometimes they have to make me stop being so hard on myself, I'll keep growing. And hopefully in the future, others won't just have one piece of work to judge me on.
“Write the kind of story you would like to read. People will give you all sorts of advice about writing, but if you are not writing something you like, no one else will like it either.”
― Meg Cabot
Saturday, May 6, 2017
Saturday, April 8, 2017
A Look to the Past
Praise the Lord, it's almost Spring Break!
It's reaching that point in the year when teachers don't want to teach and students don't want to learn! I'm in the middle of my lesson plans for next week and it is a real struggle.
It was a pretty chill week, overall. One of the reading specialists commented on how much progress my students have made in their writing since the beginning of the year, and I'm very proud of them! I also had an observation that went really well; my observer commented on how she liked that I compared my students' writing from earlier in the year until now to see their improvement.
Which led me to thinking.
I have a few completed manuscripts; I haven't finished anything since 2009 (the year I started college - coincidence?), but I have a lot of works in progress.
My dear best friend has been sending me ideas and brainstorming and encouraging me to get to writing so that I can accomplish my dream of becoming a published author. She sent me an article with a list of suggestions, and one of them was publishing a serial of sorts online to let people get a taste of your writing and get feedback.
I do have a couple of stories that I'm very proud of that I started considering: would these be good to publish? I need to go back and edit of course, and read with a critical eye. My writing, as I compare them, has gotten much better; just like my kids' writing. However, the foundational plot(s) are solid.
I'll have to admit that I'm a little hesitant, though. It's one thing to have your siblings read your work (my brother is notoriously terrible with feedback, answering questions about the story with a "I don't know," "I guess," and my favorite, "It's good"); it's another thing to let strangers or friends that you're not as close with to read and give feedback. I know it's necessary, but it's still scary.
It has been said, though, that you have to take risks for your dreams to come true; maybe this is my first step.
Reading over some of my old work is both daunting and amusing. I still have the very first story that I wrote; let me tell you, it's absolutely terrible. But when I use it as a timeline of sorts, I can remind myself of how far I've come. I've grown so much as a writer since I began writing at 11; now, at almost 26, my work has developed depth and coherence at a level that my 11-year-old self could only dream of. I've also revisited some of my writing inspirations, J.R.R. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, and Frank Peretti. I'm reminded of how much I wanted to write like them, to create stories and worlds that allow people to escape from their everyday lives.
This has only served to motivate me more.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm straight terrified to have others read my rough work. All artists leave a piece of their soul in their work, and it's hard to hear someone critique it. However, I know that this will have to happen multiple times, both before and after I get my work published. So I'll grin and bear it and get 'er done.
So now I'd like to hear from you; would you like to see me publish a serial? Leave me a comment and tell me what you think!
“A writer must teach himself that the basest of all things is to be afraid. ”
― William Faulkner
It's reaching that point in the year when teachers don't want to teach and students don't want to learn! I'm in the middle of my lesson plans for next week and it is a real struggle.
It was a pretty chill week, overall. One of the reading specialists commented on how much progress my students have made in their writing since the beginning of the year, and I'm very proud of them! I also had an observation that went really well; my observer commented on how she liked that I compared my students' writing from earlier in the year until now to see their improvement.
Which led me to thinking.
I have a few completed manuscripts; I haven't finished anything since 2009 (the year I started college - coincidence?), but I have a lot of works in progress.
My dear best friend has been sending me ideas and brainstorming and encouraging me to get to writing so that I can accomplish my dream of becoming a published author. She sent me an article with a list of suggestions, and one of them was publishing a serial of sorts online to let people get a taste of your writing and get feedback.
I do have a couple of stories that I'm very proud of that I started considering: would these be good to publish? I need to go back and edit of course, and read with a critical eye. My writing, as I compare them, has gotten much better; just like my kids' writing. However, the foundational plot(s) are solid.
I'll have to admit that I'm a little hesitant, though. It's one thing to have your siblings read your work (my brother is notoriously terrible with feedback, answering questions about the story with a "I don't know," "I guess," and my favorite, "It's good"); it's another thing to let strangers or friends that you're not as close with to read and give feedback. I know it's necessary, but it's still scary.
It has been said, though, that you have to take risks for your dreams to come true; maybe this is my first step.
Reading over some of my old work is both daunting and amusing. I still have the very first story that I wrote; let me tell you, it's absolutely terrible. But when I use it as a timeline of sorts, I can remind myself of how far I've come. I've grown so much as a writer since I began writing at 11; now, at almost 26, my work has developed depth and coherence at a level that my 11-year-old self could only dream of. I've also revisited some of my writing inspirations, J.R.R. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, and Frank Peretti. I'm reminded of how much I wanted to write like them, to create stories and worlds that allow people to escape from their everyday lives.
This has only served to motivate me more.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm straight terrified to have others read my rough work. All artists leave a piece of their soul in their work, and it's hard to hear someone critique it. However, I know that this will have to happen multiple times, both before and after I get my work published. So I'll grin and bear it and get 'er done.
So now I'd like to hear from you; would you like to see me publish a serial? Leave me a comment and tell me what you think!
“A writer must teach himself that the basest of all things is to be afraid. ”
― William Faulkner
Saturday, April 1, 2017
Where the Heart Is
So I'll just preface this by saying I paid for my Monday off of school. Issue after issue kept popping up at work, so by Friday I was over and done.
However, there have been a few good moments.
The entire 5th grade class was in trouble because someone put an inappropriate picture on the school computer, and no one would fess up to it. That whole day was practically a lost teaching day, and I was really on edge. However, one of my babies asked me if I was still going to be her second mom when she goes to the next grade, and my heart just melted.
I have a student who may be autistic, who doesn't really do hugging. However, all this week he's been super animated, making sure that I see him waving at me and hear him saying "good morning." Yesterday he saw another student hugging me, then he patted me awkwardly on the arm; I reached to pat him back, and he gave me the biggest hug.
Not gonna lie, I teared up a bit.
I saw a facebook post one day that said "I call my students "my kids" because in the time that we spend together, we become family." That is so true; the connection that I have with each of them, even those who tend to get in trouble, is special and unique. My dad keeps telling me that I might be that one teacher that my students remember when they're grown up and living their own lives, and that's something to really think about.
People like my kids, with whom I interact everyday, have a profound impact on my life, the way I think, and the way that I write.
Little interactions here and there have crept into my writing; relationships flavored by my own experiences. If you are a teacher, you know how much your kids are on your mind. I'll find myself writing something and then laughing at how much it reminds me of one or more of my kids.
I've talked before about how important relationships are to a writer; as I think more on it, I realize that my relationships with my babies are some of the most important. In this school year alone, I feel like my kids have pushed me to be a better writer.
I'll explain.
Writing is a big part of succeeding in school. Whether you like doing it or not, it's one of the skills that you will need for the rest of your life. As such, it's important to give students the tools to sharpen their skills; one of these tools are examples. Throughout each quarter, my students have different writing tasks assigned to them. I realized that the best way for me to connect with both the writing and my students is to present my own writing. For example, the students were writing biographies; I showed them the process by writing my own (highly abbreviated) biography of Alexander Hamilton. Suddenly, instead of being distanced and not caring about the examples provided to them, they were excited because their teacher was showing them the work in progress.
As I've been teaching writing skills this year, I've found myself examining my own skills and trying to better them in my work. This year I realized something; God has put me in this teaching situation to help me get better at what I want to do. My love for these kids and the desire that I have to help them do their best is the driving force to make me better at my craft.
So I will continue writing with my kids and working to improve both of our writing. Who knows? Maybe this period of training will be just what I need.
“If you want to change the world, pick up your pen and write.”
― Martin Luther
However, there have been a few good moments.
The entire 5th grade class was in trouble because someone put an inappropriate picture on the school computer, and no one would fess up to it. That whole day was practically a lost teaching day, and I was really on edge. However, one of my babies asked me if I was still going to be her second mom when she goes to the next grade, and my heart just melted.
I have a student who may be autistic, who doesn't really do hugging. However, all this week he's been super animated, making sure that I see him waving at me and hear him saying "good morning." Yesterday he saw another student hugging me, then he patted me awkwardly on the arm; I reached to pat him back, and he gave me the biggest hug.
Not gonna lie, I teared up a bit.
I saw a facebook post one day that said "I call my students "my kids" because in the time that we spend together, we become family." That is so true; the connection that I have with each of them, even those who tend to get in trouble, is special and unique. My dad keeps telling me that I might be that one teacher that my students remember when they're grown up and living their own lives, and that's something to really think about.
People like my kids, with whom I interact everyday, have a profound impact on my life, the way I think, and the way that I write.
Little interactions here and there have crept into my writing; relationships flavored by my own experiences. If you are a teacher, you know how much your kids are on your mind. I'll find myself writing something and then laughing at how much it reminds me of one or more of my kids.
I've talked before about how important relationships are to a writer; as I think more on it, I realize that my relationships with my babies are some of the most important. In this school year alone, I feel like my kids have pushed me to be a better writer.
I'll explain.
Writing is a big part of succeeding in school. Whether you like doing it or not, it's one of the skills that you will need for the rest of your life. As such, it's important to give students the tools to sharpen their skills; one of these tools are examples. Throughout each quarter, my students have different writing tasks assigned to them. I realized that the best way for me to connect with both the writing and my students is to present my own writing. For example, the students were writing biographies; I showed them the process by writing my own (highly abbreviated) biography of Alexander Hamilton. Suddenly, instead of being distanced and not caring about the examples provided to them, they were excited because their teacher was showing them the work in progress.
As I've been teaching writing skills this year, I've found myself examining my own skills and trying to better them in my work. This year I realized something; God has put me in this teaching situation to help me get better at what I want to do. My love for these kids and the desire that I have to help them do their best is the driving force to make me better at my craft.
So I will continue writing with my kids and working to improve both of our writing. Who knows? Maybe this period of training will be just what I need.
“If you want to change the world, pick up your pen and write.”
― Martin Luther
Sunday, March 26, 2017
The Importance of Relations
One week closer to Spring Break! ....and teachers are getting sick and dropping like flies. I haven't gotten sick yet, so everyone thinks I'm going down next. I'm trying my hardest to make sure that doesn't happen....
Anyway, it's been a pretty nice week. The third quarter is over, which means it's almost time to start planning for end of the year testing. Funnnnnn. My mentor teacher visited me yesterday, and one of her comments to me was "You have such a great relationship with your kids, and it shows!"
It got me to thinking.
As an artist who takes inspiration from my own life, the relationships that I have influence the relationships that I describe in my stories. The teacher/student relationship that I have with my babies, the parent/child relationship I have with my parents, the coworker relationships, the sibling relationships, and the brother/sister from another mother/mister relationships all flavor the way that I see the world. While some of these relationships may have similarities, they all have a different impact on my life.
I started thinking about the relationships that I describe in my stories. The story I'm working on features a brother/sister duo, where the brother is the oldest but the sister acts like the mother. They have a playful relationship with one of their coworkers. Already I begin to see how differently I would describe these relationships if I did not have the experiences that I have had.
Relationships aren't really in the forefront of my stories, though they form an important part; just like your brain isn't the first thing that people see, but your face wouldn't work without it. The trick is finding subtle ways to explain these relationships; little interactions between people that show their feelings towards one another. I'm not going to lie, sometimes it can be challenging. But someone gave me advice one day a long time ago, and it is advice that I tell my students today. "Show, don't tell." So rather than spend time writing long paragraphs describing the relationships between the characters, I take the time to craft dialogue and actions that let the reader figure it out for themselves.
My experience as an actor also showed me the importance of relationships and interactions; though you are portraying a character, you have to draw from your own experiences to bring your character to life. It was an extremely challenging task for me to play a character who had fallen in love, because I had never been. However, I have played a sister and a servant; and for these roles I had some background knowledge.
I'm not going to say that it is impossible to write about (or perform) relationships that you've never had; what I will say is that the more relationships that you are in, the easier it is to write. I'm a firm believer that God has made me wait to have anything published because I had not had enough world experience to make my writing believable. But now that He has given me the feeling that I'll publish something this year, I'm doing my best to use the knowledge that I have to improve my craft. Let's see how this turns out!
“How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live.”
― Henry David Thoreau
Anyway, it's been a pretty nice week. The third quarter is over, which means it's almost time to start planning for end of the year testing. Funnnnnn. My mentor teacher visited me yesterday, and one of her comments to me was "You have such a great relationship with your kids, and it shows!"
It got me to thinking.
As an artist who takes inspiration from my own life, the relationships that I have influence the relationships that I describe in my stories. The teacher/student relationship that I have with my babies, the parent/child relationship I have with my parents, the coworker relationships, the sibling relationships, and the brother/sister from another mother/mister relationships all flavor the way that I see the world. While some of these relationships may have similarities, they all have a different impact on my life.
I started thinking about the relationships that I describe in my stories. The story I'm working on features a brother/sister duo, where the brother is the oldest but the sister acts like the mother. They have a playful relationship with one of their coworkers. Already I begin to see how differently I would describe these relationships if I did not have the experiences that I have had.
Relationships aren't really in the forefront of my stories, though they form an important part; just like your brain isn't the first thing that people see, but your face wouldn't work without it. The trick is finding subtle ways to explain these relationships; little interactions between people that show their feelings towards one another. I'm not going to lie, sometimes it can be challenging. But someone gave me advice one day a long time ago, and it is advice that I tell my students today. "Show, don't tell." So rather than spend time writing long paragraphs describing the relationships between the characters, I take the time to craft dialogue and actions that let the reader figure it out for themselves.
My experience as an actor also showed me the importance of relationships and interactions; though you are portraying a character, you have to draw from your own experiences to bring your character to life. It was an extremely challenging task for me to play a character who had fallen in love, because I had never been. However, I have played a sister and a servant; and for these roles I had some background knowledge.
I'm not going to say that it is impossible to write about (or perform) relationships that you've never had; what I will say is that the more relationships that you are in, the easier it is to write. I'm a firm believer that God has made me wait to have anything published because I had not had enough world experience to make my writing believable. But now that He has given me the feeling that I'll publish something this year, I'm doing my best to use the knowledge that I have to improve my craft. Let's see how this turns out!
“How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live.”
― Henry David Thoreau
Saturday, March 18, 2017
My Harshest Critic
Another week closer to Spring Break (which, for the east coast, doesn't start until April). Oddly enough, we just had our first snow day of the school year this week. That's fine, though. I most certainly enjoyed it!
It's been an extremely restful week; I don't really say that during the school year, but it really has. Lesson plans are done, grades nearly so, and I have time to think about what we'll be doing in two weeks. In addition, my babies have been making significant process in their writing (which, as you may have guessed, makes me really happy)!
As I spent time this week grading some of their writing and leaving constructive criticism, I could not help but think about how critical I can be of my own writing. I don't like showing people my work in progress because I always think that it can be better. I constantly am writing and erasing, writing and erasing. It's hard for me to just write until I can write no more during a session, because I immediately see errors that I've made or things that just don't make sense.
It's a little easier when I'm working on longer projects, like I am now, because the continuity problems such as someone's name being spelled three different ways are much farther away from each other. Still, as an editing session with my best friend proved, I can freak out over tiny mistakes that literally anyone would make.
I began wondering...is this what is holding me back from making more progress on my work? Is being too critical the hobble that I'm putting on my metaphorical leg?
People close to me will tell you that I'm critical of everything I do. Which is why I don't show my creating to others often. Writing, drawing, even dancing. If I think it's terrible, you'll never see it. Even my teaching is subject to my harshness, which explains why I'm surprised when my evaluations of late have been stellar. It just goes to show you (me) that you are your worst critic.
So that is my focus this week. Don't be so critical. It may seem simple, but I know that it will be important for me to succeed. Let's see how it goes!
"One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple."
- Jack Kerouac
It's been an extremely restful week; I don't really say that during the school year, but it really has. Lesson plans are done, grades nearly so, and I have time to think about what we'll be doing in two weeks. In addition, my babies have been making significant process in their writing (which, as you may have guessed, makes me really happy)!
As I spent time this week grading some of their writing and leaving constructive criticism, I could not help but think about how critical I can be of my own writing. I don't like showing people my work in progress because I always think that it can be better. I constantly am writing and erasing, writing and erasing. It's hard for me to just write until I can write no more during a session, because I immediately see errors that I've made or things that just don't make sense.
It's a little easier when I'm working on longer projects, like I am now, because the continuity problems such as someone's name being spelled three different ways are much farther away from each other. Still, as an editing session with my best friend proved, I can freak out over tiny mistakes that literally anyone would make.
I began wondering...is this what is holding me back from making more progress on my work? Is being too critical the hobble that I'm putting on my metaphorical leg?
People close to me will tell you that I'm critical of everything I do. Which is why I don't show my creating to others often. Writing, drawing, even dancing. If I think it's terrible, you'll never see it. Even my teaching is subject to my harshness, which explains why I'm surprised when my evaluations of late have been stellar. It just goes to show you (me) that you are your worst critic.
So that is my focus this week. Don't be so critical. It may seem simple, but I know that it will be important for me to succeed. Let's see how it goes!
"One day I will find the right words, and they will be simple."
- Jack Kerouac
Saturday, March 11, 2017
Women's Inspiration
Despite it almost being spring, it seems the weather here is determined to dump snow on us. The weather has been fluctuating between unseasonably warm and bone shatteringly cold, which has left many of my school's students and teachers out sick this week. Believe me, Clorox wipes and hand sanitizer have been my best friends!
This week something happened at the last minute that really reinforced the power that a group of people can have when they put their minds to it. Wednesday was International Women's Day, as well as the "Day Without a Woman" protest. There were so many women in my school district who took off work that the superintendent cancelled school for the students!
As usual, I tried to think about the power of women in my writing. Most of my protagonists are women; after all, I am one. My heroines tend to be women of power or skill, who also have personal demons to wrestle with. But the story that I'm working on is different. My heroine is still a girl, but she's an ordinary person with a nine-to-five who lives her adventures through books (kinda like me in that respect). Even though she does not have the recognition or power that my previous heroines have had, she still manages to have a huge impact on those around her.
I write about women because I know how incredibly complex and diverse we are. There is no one mixture of skills, beliefs, or looks that create the perfect woman; so there is never a shortage of them to read about. The women who made statements on the "Day Without A Woman" were not all powerful and well-known people; they were teachers, and mothers, and wives who are not known outside of their friends, family, and work groups. But their decision to either take off from work, wear red, or shop at only female owned stores on that day sent a powerful message.
I don't want to create stories about the typical woman who falls easily in love with her knight in shining armor; instead, I want to write about normal women who are just trying to live their live and encounter new things along the way. I want women and girls like me, who's only dangerous adventure comes from reading a book, to be able to relate with the women in my stories. I want the impact that women can have to be real and relatable to everyone who reads my stories.
My best friend and editor thinks that I'll finish a book this year; I'm praying that it happens. Until it does, I'll keep on writing about my ladies and taking inspiration from the ones around me.
“What you're supposed to do when you don't like a thing is change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Don't complain.”
― Maya Angelou
This week something happened at the last minute that really reinforced the power that a group of people can have when they put their minds to it. Wednesday was International Women's Day, as well as the "Day Without a Woman" protest. There were so many women in my school district who took off work that the superintendent cancelled school for the students!
As usual, I tried to think about the power of women in my writing. Most of my protagonists are women; after all, I am one. My heroines tend to be women of power or skill, who also have personal demons to wrestle with. But the story that I'm working on is different. My heroine is still a girl, but she's an ordinary person with a nine-to-five who lives her adventures through books (kinda like me in that respect). Even though she does not have the recognition or power that my previous heroines have had, she still manages to have a huge impact on those around her.
I write about women because I know how incredibly complex and diverse we are. There is no one mixture of skills, beliefs, or looks that create the perfect woman; so there is never a shortage of them to read about. The women who made statements on the "Day Without A Woman" were not all powerful and well-known people; they were teachers, and mothers, and wives who are not known outside of their friends, family, and work groups. But their decision to either take off from work, wear red, or shop at only female owned stores on that day sent a powerful message.
I don't want to create stories about the typical woman who falls easily in love with her knight in shining armor; instead, I want to write about normal women who are just trying to live their live and encounter new things along the way. I want women and girls like me, who's only dangerous adventure comes from reading a book, to be able to relate with the women in my stories. I want the impact that women can have to be real and relatable to everyone who reads my stories.
My best friend and editor thinks that I'll finish a book this year; I'm praying that it happens. Until it does, I'll keep on writing about my ladies and taking inspiration from the ones around me.
“What you're supposed to do when you don't like a thing is change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Don't complain.”
― Maya Angelou
Saturday, March 4, 2017
Why Are You Doing This?
This time last year, my fellow first year teacher and I were counting down the seconds (instead of days) until school was finally out for the year. Things were so bad that we dreaded coming to work.
If you had seen me teaching then, you would understand the complete turn around that I've had.
As a matter of fact, around this time last year I was starting to become more confident in my teaching skills. Now, after receiving a great evaluation, I see that it was smart to stick it out and not let my terrible first year of teaching scare me away forever.
I had many mentors in the building, but one gave me some words of wisdom that have stuck with me. "The kids can tell when someone is only here to make a paycheck, and trust me, they have it worse than you. When you are really there for them, that's when you can find your reason to keep going."
That advice, along with the advice of others, helped me get to where I am as a teacher.
What does that have to do with writing?
Well, it gets me thinking about my future. Do I want to write books for fame and money? Honestly, I can say that the answer is no. I have had countless dreams and ideas that I want to share with people because of my love of a good story. This is what keeps me going, no matter how many times I've had stories rejected or critiqued to bits. I'm here for the art of it, the freedom of expression that writing provides. If I was in this for the money, I'd have abandoned writing a long time ago!
I know that writing is my passion, and I will continue to write to fulfill that passion. If someone were to ask me why I write, I would tell them this: God didn't give me this gift to not do anything with it. If this is what he wants me to do with my life, then I'll do it. If He means for this to be the way that I pay my bills, so be it. If not, oh well. At least I won't be sitting on what He's given me.
“You can make anything by writing.”
― C.S. Lewis
If you had seen me teaching then, you would understand the complete turn around that I've had.
As a matter of fact, around this time last year I was starting to become more confident in my teaching skills. Now, after receiving a great evaluation, I see that it was smart to stick it out and not let my terrible first year of teaching scare me away forever.
I had many mentors in the building, but one gave me some words of wisdom that have stuck with me. "The kids can tell when someone is only here to make a paycheck, and trust me, they have it worse than you. When you are really there for them, that's when you can find your reason to keep going."
That advice, along with the advice of others, helped me get to where I am as a teacher.
What does that have to do with writing?
Well, it gets me thinking about my future. Do I want to write books for fame and money? Honestly, I can say that the answer is no. I have had countless dreams and ideas that I want to share with people because of my love of a good story. This is what keeps me going, no matter how many times I've had stories rejected or critiqued to bits. I'm here for the art of it, the freedom of expression that writing provides. If I was in this for the money, I'd have abandoned writing a long time ago!
I know that writing is my passion, and I will continue to write to fulfill that passion. If someone were to ask me why I write, I would tell them this: God didn't give me this gift to not do anything with it. If this is what he wants me to do with my life, then I'll do it. If He means for this to be the way that I pay my bills, so be it. If not, oh well. At least I won't be sitting on what He's given me.
“You can make anything by writing.”
― C.S. Lewis
Saturday, February 25, 2017
What Hard Work Can Do
February 25, 2017
I believe that this has been one of the longest weeks of my life. Even though we didn't have school on Monday, there was so much else going on that I at times felt overwhelmed. Even after a reasonably restful day today, I still feel exhausted and behind.
My kids have just gone through a round of testing, and I admit that I wasn't very pleased with their results. I was talking with my co-workers trying to decide what I need to change to help my kids make progress in their learning when the results from a specific test blew me away.
I'll explain. One of the tests that they just took had two parts; a reading assessment and a writing assessment. The reading scores came back weeks ago, and those were the ones that I was stressing over. But then the writing scores came in and the growth that I saw blew me away.
One of my students grew 62 points!
I realized then that I had fallen into my old habit of making everything worse than it was. I'm a hard grader; I set high expectations for both the students and myself, and I get upset when they're not met. One of my coworkers said, "Think about it this way; you see their work every day, so it's harder for you to see the growth because it's subtle. But when you compare their writing from the first test to this one, it's easier to see the differences."
I have been working so hard with them on writing (it is, after all, what I plan to do with my life); we break down what is expected of them, define terms, create outlines, write summaries. It would seem that our hard work has created a difference.
This led me to think about my own writing. Even though I've encouraged my students to create outlines, I'd never done it for myself (unless you count my revising stage when I write down the events that have happened in order and correct names and other details). Spurred on from a talk with one of my best friends, I decided to try it on the book I'm working on. I started with the few events that I'd already written and started from there.
Half an hour later, I had a plot.
I literally tell my students that the purpose of writing an outline is so that you do the hard work on the front end, then shape the information into the proper form. Why wasn't I following that advice myself?
Now I have a clear view of subplots and character information to begin building in as I write. I always know a big picture and some of the big events in my stories, but the details usually come out in slow, painstaking fashion. The few chances that I've had to write this week have been insanely productive, and I'm so happy about it!
February is almost over. Though I only have 18 pages, I would hazard to say that it is some of my best and most coherent work that I've ever written at this stage in the process. Maybe I should listen to my friends (and myself, apparently!) more often when it comes to my writing!
“Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout with some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.”
― George Orwell
I believe that this has been one of the longest weeks of my life. Even though we didn't have school on Monday, there was so much else going on that I at times felt overwhelmed. Even after a reasonably restful day today, I still feel exhausted and behind.
My kids have just gone through a round of testing, and I admit that I wasn't very pleased with their results. I was talking with my co-workers trying to decide what I need to change to help my kids make progress in their learning when the results from a specific test blew me away.
I'll explain. One of the tests that they just took had two parts; a reading assessment and a writing assessment. The reading scores came back weeks ago, and those were the ones that I was stressing over. But then the writing scores came in and the growth that I saw blew me away.
One of my students grew 62 points!
I realized then that I had fallen into my old habit of making everything worse than it was. I'm a hard grader; I set high expectations for both the students and myself, and I get upset when they're not met. One of my coworkers said, "Think about it this way; you see their work every day, so it's harder for you to see the growth because it's subtle. But when you compare their writing from the first test to this one, it's easier to see the differences."
I have been working so hard with them on writing (it is, after all, what I plan to do with my life); we break down what is expected of them, define terms, create outlines, write summaries. It would seem that our hard work has created a difference.
This led me to think about my own writing. Even though I've encouraged my students to create outlines, I'd never done it for myself (unless you count my revising stage when I write down the events that have happened in order and correct names and other details). Spurred on from a talk with one of my best friends, I decided to try it on the book I'm working on. I started with the few events that I'd already written and started from there.
Half an hour later, I had a plot.
I literally tell my students that the purpose of writing an outline is so that you do the hard work on the front end, then shape the information into the proper form. Why wasn't I following that advice myself?
Now I have a clear view of subplots and character information to begin building in as I write. I always know a big picture and some of the big events in my stories, but the details usually come out in slow, painstaking fashion. The few chances that I've had to write this week have been insanely productive, and I'm so happy about it!
February is almost over. Though I only have 18 pages, I would hazard to say that it is some of my best and most coherent work that I've ever written at this stage in the process. Maybe I should listen to my friends (and myself, apparently!) more often when it comes to my writing!
“Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout with some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.”
― George Orwell
Saturday, February 18, 2017
Musings From My Mind
Dreams are quite interesting, aren't they?
Think of a dream you've had. Have you ever woken up with the biggest smile on your face, or had to sit for a moment to fully realize what just happened?
I had several dreams this week that took me a minute to figure out what I had just dreamed about. Strangely though, those are the dreams that give me the most material to work with.
One night I promise that I had three dreams in one night; they all seemed to have nothing in common (save the people in it); I spent the rest of the day trying to figure out if there was a theme or something to connect them (something I've been teaching my kids lately). I never came up with anything, but it was a great exercise.
I also notice that the artistic things that I take in influence my dreams. For example, I've been binge-watching a show called "Turn" which is about a spy ring during the Revolutionary War. A lot of my dreams lately have been about being a spy, or being a slave or servant in the house of a British officer, and other such things.
Though the story that I'm currently working on doesn't really have anything to do with any of this, I take it as another great exercise. How can the emotions and overall feel of a narrative be captured in my writing?
When I was younger, my writing was simple. Basic ideas; I had a dream and I wrote it down. And let's be honest, dreams don't really follow a set story structure. I didn't really know how to add emotion and intrigue and adventure. Possibly because I hadn't experienced anything. I hadn't been in a relationship, I hadn't lived far from my family, I hadn't even strayed outside of my family's friend circle. I look back on my earlier works and honestly ask myself how I possibly expected this stuff to get published.
Once I got into college, though, things started happening. Not all at once, mind, but they did happen. I made new friends, friends that my family didn't know. I started pursuing my passions of acting and singing and ballroom dancing. I spent more time outside of my house. Then it hit me; it's hard to write about things that you have no experience of. I've always loved subtle romance in a story; but since I'd never been in love, I could not accurately capture the feelings that love could bring. I'd never really drifted away from a friendship, so I couldn't talk about the way that it can slip away. Emotions like these (and more) have truly enriched my writing.
I read somewhere once that one of the ways to become a better writer is to experience things. Travelling, talking to people, experiencing the arts. Because writing is my goal, I will continue to take in and experience all of the things around me in order to improve my craft; after all, at some point it must move away from musings and onto the page.
"The only source of knowledge is experience." - Albert Einstein
Think of a dream you've had. Have you ever woken up with the biggest smile on your face, or had to sit for a moment to fully realize what just happened?
I had several dreams this week that took me a minute to figure out what I had just dreamed about. Strangely though, those are the dreams that give me the most material to work with.
One night I promise that I had three dreams in one night; they all seemed to have nothing in common (save the people in it); I spent the rest of the day trying to figure out if there was a theme or something to connect them (something I've been teaching my kids lately). I never came up with anything, but it was a great exercise.
I also notice that the artistic things that I take in influence my dreams. For example, I've been binge-watching a show called "Turn" which is about a spy ring during the Revolutionary War. A lot of my dreams lately have been about being a spy, or being a slave or servant in the house of a British officer, and other such things.
Though the story that I'm currently working on doesn't really have anything to do with any of this, I take it as another great exercise. How can the emotions and overall feel of a narrative be captured in my writing?
When I was younger, my writing was simple. Basic ideas; I had a dream and I wrote it down. And let's be honest, dreams don't really follow a set story structure. I didn't really know how to add emotion and intrigue and adventure. Possibly because I hadn't experienced anything. I hadn't been in a relationship, I hadn't lived far from my family, I hadn't even strayed outside of my family's friend circle. I look back on my earlier works and honestly ask myself how I possibly expected this stuff to get published.
Once I got into college, though, things started happening. Not all at once, mind, but they did happen. I made new friends, friends that my family didn't know. I started pursuing my passions of acting and singing and ballroom dancing. I spent more time outside of my house. Then it hit me; it's hard to write about things that you have no experience of. I've always loved subtle romance in a story; but since I'd never been in love, I could not accurately capture the feelings that love could bring. I'd never really drifted away from a friendship, so I couldn't talk about the way that it can slip away. Emotions like these (and more) have truly enriched my writing.
I read somewhere once that one of the ways to become a better writer is to experience things. Travelling, talking to people, experiencing the arts. Because writing is my goal, I will continue to take in and experience all of the things around me in order to improve my craft; after all, at some point it must move away from musings and onto the page.
"The only source of knowledge is experience." - Albert Einstein
Friday, February 10, 2017
Music and Lyrics
My my, how fast time has gone! It seems like just yesterday I was writing my last post. Yet here we are again, on a Friday afternoon.
Normally I have to take a minute to ponder what I will write about; today, however, I have something very clear.
Last night I was privileged enough to attend a performance by the Alvin Ailey Dance Theatre. For those of you who may not be familiar with them, it was founded by Alvin Ailey, an African-American choreographer who was instrumental in providing opportunities for black dancers starting in the late 1650s. I already love dance and jazz, and the performance was a perfect mixture of the two (with a little Negro Spiritual thrown in there).
One of the things that I've always been proud of is my inclusion in a community of artists; actors, musicians, choreographers, dancers, writers, and so on. Instrumental to the growth of any artist is the experience of the art of others, and last night was a wonderful example of that.
The costumes, the choreography, the lighting, even the props all worked together in concert to create a beautiful, captivating performance. The dancers made be think back to my school days when I would dance around the house when everyone was gone, or even to college when I attended ballroom dance classes. Movement is such an important element in all types of art; even writing. I've mentioned before how I sometimes act out my character's responses in order to find the right word to capture the movement. The difference that one word or one move makes can change the whole character of the piece, whether in writing or in dance.
Even though the scenes tended to have clear arcs and storylines, I found myself creating storylines in my head as they danced. What would this character say that would match the expression of the dancer's movement? It was a thrilling exercise in imagination.
In the same manner, when I was younger I would create storylines to match the instrumental piece that I was listening to. It just goes to show you how important the collaboration between the arts is to creating new and wonderful things. Can you imagine watching Star Wars without the soundtrack? Wouldn't it be a different experience? In the same way, the dances that I saw last night helped to spark my imagination.
Though it's been a very busy week and I have not gotten to write as much as I've wanted, I'm still hopeful for what I will get to write over the weekend. My mind hasn't stopped replaying the dances from last night; hopefully some of the feelings can transfer into my words.
"The creative process is not controlled by a switch you can simply turn on or off; it's with you all the time." - Alvin Ailey
Normally I have to take a minute to ponder what I will write about; today, however, I have something very clear.
Last night I was privileged enough to attend a performance by the Alvin Ailey Dance Theatre. For those of you who may not be familiar with them, it was founded by Alvin Ailey, an African-American choreographer who was instrumental in providing opportunities for black dancers starting in the late 1650s. I already love dance and jazz, and the performance was a perfect mixture of the two (with a little Negro Spiritual thrown in there).
One of the things that I've always been proud of is my inclusion in a community of artists; actors, musicians, choreographers, dancers, writers, and so on. Instrumental to the growth of any artist is the experience of the art of others, and last night was a wonderful example of that.
The costumes, the choreography, the lighting, even the props all worked together in concert to create a beautiful, captivating performance. The dancers made be think back to my school days when I would dance around the house when everyone was gone, or even to college when I attended ballroom dance classes. Movement is such an important element in all types of art; even writing. I've mentioned before how I sometimes act out my character's responses in order to find the right word to capture the movement. The difference that one word or one move makes can change the whole character of the piece, whether in writing or in dance.
Even though the scenes tended to have clear arcs and storylines, I found myself creating storylines in my head as they danced. What would this character say that would match the expression of the dancer's movement? It was a thrilling exercise in imagination.
In the same manner, when I was younger I would create storylines to match the instrumental piece that I was listening to. It just goes to show you how important the collaboration between the arts is to creating new and wonderful things. Can you imagine watching Star Wars without the soundtrack? Wouldn't it be a different experience? In the same way, the dances that I saw last night helped to spark my imagination.
Though it's been a very busy week and I have not gotten to write as much as I've wanted, I'm still hopeful for what I will get to write over the weekend. My mind hasn't stopped replaying the dances from last night; hopefully some of the feelings can transfer into my words.
"The creative process is not controlled by a switch you can simply turn on or off; it's with you all the time." - Alvin Ailey
Saturday, February 4, 2017
Prophecies and Prayers
First things first, yes, I know that I'm publishing this on Saturday instead of Friday. It's just been that kind of week.
There comes a point in the school year when both the teachers and the students are just tired of school; we have hit that point. In short, I'm very excited to come home at the end of the day. Friday night I came home, took a nap, and woke up rather late. So I decided to post today.
But on to business.
On Sunday morning, I went to church and heard a great sermon. The pastor was really hitting it hard and giving some great points to consider. But one thing in particular stood out to me. Many times during a sermon, the pastor will say some general statements to get their point across. You'll buy that house you wanted, you'll get out of debt, etc. But in the midst of these statements, he said this:
"Your book will get published this year."
Now you all know by now that my dream is to be a published author; that's what it has been since I wrote my first (crappy) story at 11 years old. When I heard him say this I thought to myself, "wow. Is this what confirmation feels like?"
I set myself a goal to get published this year. I don't have grad school to take up my time; all that I really do is work. So I said that this would be the year that my book gets published.
One day during Christmas break, I was suddenly inspired to look at my old blog posts, which is why I'm here now. Pretty sure that one was God.
Instead of setting a New Year's resolution, I set myself a few goals. A few days later while talking to a coworker of mine, she also mentioned that she sets herself goals every year. God again.
Now that my goal is set, I hear the pastor deliver this word. If ever I was in doubt about my dream, I think God has handled that.
I was having a conversation with one of my best friends, whose dream it is to become an actor. I acted in college as well (that's how we met) and I do really love being on stage. He asked me why I didn't consider making it a profession. After a lot of consideration, I realized it was because I did not have the same drive for acting as he does. My drive is for writing. If I were to be rejected over and over again for roles, I would be very discouraged. But I've submitted stories to magazines for publication, and haven't been chosen once; however, that only pushes me harder to find the right magazine or journal for my work.
And if I needed any more encouragement, I had a conversation just yesterday with one of the substitutes at my school about writing and getting published.
She asked me how long I'd been teaching, and if I might stay in the profession for 25 years. I told her the honest truth: I do love teaching, but my passion is writing. If a book of mine gets published, and I have enough money to pay off my student loans and live, you can bet my full time job will be writing. She was very interested, and said that she wished she could write.
It just goes to show that God will let you know where you're supposed to go. When I was hired for my current teaching position, the first principal that I talked to at the job fair (who called me over to her) hired me. I was easily approved for an apartment. I had a friend willing to help me drive from Mississippi to Maryland.
So I will keep writing, though at times it may be hard, or I may have to overcome writer's block. I'm chasing my dream and praying that the right situation will come around to make it a reality.
“The scariest moment is always just before you start.”
― Stephen King
There comes a point in the school year when both the teachers and the students are just tired of school; we have hit that point. In short, I'm very excited to come home at the end of the day. Friday night I came home, took a nap, and woke up rather late. So I decided to post today.
But on to business.
On Sunday morning, I went to church and heard a great sermon. The pastor was really hitting it hard and giving some great points to consider. But one thing in particular stood out to me. Many times during a sermon, the pastor will say some general statements to get their point across. You'll buy that house you wanted, you'll get out of debt, etc. But in the midst of these statements, he said this:
"Your book will get published this year."
Now you all know by now that my dream is to be a published author; that's what it has been since I wrote my first (crappy) story at 11 years old. When I heard him say this I thought to myself, "wow. Is this what confirmation feels like?"
I set myself a goal to get published this year. I don't have grad school to take up my time; all that I really do is work. So I said that this would be the year that my book gets published.
One day during Christmas break, I was suddenly inspired to look at my old blog posts, which is why I'm here now. Pretty sure that one was God.
Instead of setting a New Year's resolution, I set myself a few goals. A few days later while talking to a coworker of mine, she also mentioned that she sets herself goals every year. God again.
Now that my goal is set, I hear the pastor deliver this word. If ever I was in doubt about my dream, I think God has handled that.
I was having a conversation with one of my best friends, whose dream it is to become an actor. I acted in college as well (that's how we met) and I do really love being on stage. He asked me why I didn't consider making it a profession. After a lot of consideration, I realized it was because I did not have the same drive for acting as he does. My drive is for writing. If I were to be rejected over and over again for roles, I would be very discouraged. But I've submitted stories to magazines for publication, and haven't been chosen once; however, that only pushes me harder to find the right magazine or journal for my work.
And if I needed any more encouragement, I had a conversation just yesterday with one of the substitutes at my school about writing and getting published.
She asked me how long I'd been teaching, and if I might stay in the profession for 25 years. I told her the honest truth: I do love teaching, but my passion is writing. If a book of mine gets published, and I have enough money to pay off my student loans and live, you can bet my full time job will be writing. She was very interested, and said that she wished she could write.
It just goes to show that God will let you know where you're supposed to go. When I was hired for my current teaching position, the first principal that I talked to at the job fair (who called me over to her) hired me. I was easily approved for an apartment. I had a friend willing to help me drive from Mississippi to Maryland.
So I will keep writing, though at times it may be hard, or I may have to overcome writer's block. I'm chasing my dream and praying that the right situation will come around to make it a reality.
“The scariest moment is always just before you start.”
― Stephen King
Friday, January 27, 2017
And Just Like That, January's Over
Can you believe that it's already almost February? I'm blown away by it myself.
The weeks seem to be dragging by, while the weekends fly by too quickly. And here we are again, at another weekend which will probably be gone before you know it.
I'm sad to report that I haven't done much writing this week. Circumstances beyond my control have left me collapsing into bed far past my bedtime, with only the energy to move a thumb (to scroll through facebook...) Not a great excuse, I know. But hey, as long as I'm alive there is another opportunity to start again.
I still have been daydreaming and imagining things, though. One of the crucial parts of my personal writing process is imagining what will happen in my stories; what people will say, how they will say it, and why. If you ever catch me acting strangely or talking to myself when I'm alone, chances are that I'm trying to find the right words to bring my imagination to the page.
When I was still in my teens and writing, my youngest sister once caught me scowling at the computer screen. "What are you doing?" She asked suspiciously, regarding me as if I was crazy.
"Um...trying to find the right word..." I said, embarrassed.
Though I laugh about it now, I realize that, in some respects, I have grown in confidence in my writing. True, allowing others to read it and give me feedback still terrifies me; however, I will actually give it to those I trust. I also find that I can whip up an example passage for my students and it be passably okay. My willingness to act out my words has also proven helpful in teaching my students the importance of the words that you choose in your writing.
Today I demonstrated the difference between "Ms. Ross walked across the classroom" and "Ms. Ross stumbled across the classroom." The kids immediately began giving other examples of how I walked across the classroom; I found myself having to stop them so that we could move on with the lesson.
I'm not the most confident of people, I'll admit it. But when I'm in my element, doing something that I love to do, I have just a wee bit more confidence. Maybe I can get it to spill over into other elements of my life, like singing. Until then, my writing will have to do.
One thing that I love about writing is that I can inhabit worlds that don't exist; I can be characters that exhibit characteristics that I wish I had (swordfighting. I really wish I knew how to use a sword, even though it really makes no sense). Writing allows me not only to experience them in a way, but to share them with others. I guess that's the reason that some (all) of my main characters have my quirks.
So I guess my point is, I write because I need the outlet. As we move into February, I'm hopeful that I can use that outlet even more.
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
― Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings
The weeks seem to be dragging by, while the weekends fly by too quickly. And here we are again, at another weekend which will probably be gone before you know it.
I'm sad to report that I haven't done much writing this week. Circumstances beyond my control have left me collapsing into bed far past my bedtime, with only the energy to move a thumb (to scroll through facebook...) Not a great excuse, I know. But hey, as long as I'm alive there is another opportunity to start again.
I still have been daydreaming and imagining things, though. One of the crucial parts of my personal writing process is imagining what will happen in my stories; what people will say, how they will say it, and why. If you ever catch me acting strangely or talking to myself when I'm alone, chances are that I'm trying to find the right words to bring my imagination to the page.
When I was still in my teens and writing, my youngest sister once caught me scowling at the computer screen. "What are you doing?" She asked suspiciously, regarding me as if I was crazy.
"Um...trying to find the right word..." I said, embarrassed.
Though I laugh about it now, I realize that, in some respects, I have grown in confidence in my writing. True, allowing others to read it and give me feedback still terrifies me; however, I will actually give it to those I trust. I also find that I can whip up an example passage for my students and it be passably okay. My willingness to act out my words has also proven helpful in teaching my students the importance of the words that you choose in your writing.
Today I demonstrated the difference between "Ms. Ross walked across the classroom" and "Ms. Ross stumbled across the classroom." The kids immediately began giving other examples of how I walked across the classroom; I found myself having to stop them so that we could move on with the lesson.
I'm not the most confident of people, I'll admit it. But when I'm in my element, doing something that I love to do, I have just a wee bit more confidence. Maybe I can get it to spill over into other elements of my life, like singing. Until then, my writing will have to do.
One thing that I love about writing is that I can inhabit worlds that don't exist; I can be characters that exhibit characteristics that I wish I had (swordfighting. I really wish I knew how to use a sword, even though it really makes no sense). Writing allows me not only to experience them in a way, but to share them with others. I guess that's the reason that some (all) of my main characters have my quirks.
So I guess my point is, I write because I need the outlet. As we move into February, I'm hopeful that I can use that outlet even more.
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
― Maya Angelou, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings
Friday, January 20, 2017
The Mind Is a Curious Thing
For a writer, it could be said that the mind is your most important tool. Therefore it is important to cultivate it, to challenge it. Read, watch the news, etc. This week seems to have been the week for that.
Daily, I let my imagination wander. But there have been some serious real-world issues that have truly been making my thoughts run rampant.
The inauguration was today. I don't like sharing my political opinion, so I'll just say that our new president has made many of the people around me worry.
This week, I saw a part of the documentary "Thirteen" by Ava Duvernay. I'd been meaning to see the whole thing, but you know how life can get you caught up. Anyway. I was captivated by the pictures and interviews I saw. African Americans have been through so much, however, having only been born in 1991, I'm far removed from any of the Civil Rights Movement and the fight that was fought to win us equal rights. Reading about it and watching movies and documentaries isn't the same as living through it.
However, I got to hear from someone that lived during that era, and my mind was blown.
One of the older gentlemen that I work with told my class that he was present during the Birmingham Children's March (which I had never heard of), and that he had been arrested along with several other young boys, held in an enclosure for seven days, and even has scars on his legs from dog bites. I was in awe of this man and his experiences. You would never know from meeting him that he had been through anything like that; yet here he was, calmly recounting these events to a group of ten year olds (and an equally awed 25 year old!) as if he was telling us about visits to his grandmother's.
This really sent my mind into overdrive.
Most of a writer's stories are flavored by experiences that they've had or stories they've read or heard. I've been busily thinking about the emotions and thoughts that people in that era must have experienced. The reasons that people from our history decided to put their lives on the line for what they believed. Why they were willing to stand up for something. These emotions and thoughts that people had as they marched and were beaten and arrested and more, what drove them?
It's important for a writer to make connections to their audience. Taking from these real-world experiences and filtering them through my writing ensures that people have some thread of connection, rather than just reading words on a page. The best stories are those that intertwine the human spirit with the words; these are the stories that you remember for years and go back to over and over again. Lord of the Rings showed me courage and adventure. The Cooper Kids series by Frank Peretti (the author who first inspired me to begin writing) showed me that trust in God didn't have to be shoehorned into a plot just because the writer was the Christian; rather, it was simply a truth that the characters believed. The challenge for myself is to capture feelings like these in my writing.
By the time that this year is over, I hope to be able to say that with confidence. To reach that goal, I will continue to read and write and experience the world around me and the history that I am a part of. You never know; maybe the words that I use will make people think the way that my colleagues words made me think.
"Be passionate and move forward with gusto every single hour of every single day until you reach your goal." - Ava DuVernay
Daily, I let my imagination wander. But there have been some serious real-world issues that have truly been making my thoughts run rampant.
The inauguration was today. I don't like sharing my political opinion, so I'll just say that our new president has made many of the people around me worry.
This week, I saw a part of the documentary "Thirteen" by Ava Duvernay. I'd been meaning to see the whole thing, but you know how life can get you caught up. Anyway. I was captivated by the pictures and interviews I saw. African Americans have been through so much, however, having only been born in 1991, I'm far removed from any of the Civil Rights Movement and the fight that was fought to win us equal rights. Reading about it and watching movies and documentaries isn't the same as living through it.
However, I got to hear from someone that lived during that era, and my mind was blown.
One of the older gentlemen that I work with told my class that he was present during the Birmingham Children's March (which I had never heard of), and that he had been arrested along with several other young boys, held in an enclosure for seven days, and even has scars on his legs from dog bites. I was in awe of this man and his experiences. You would never know from meeting him that he had been through anything like that; yet here he was, calmly recounting these events to a group of ten year olds (and an equally awed 25 year old!) as if he was telling us about visits to his grandmother's.
This really sent my mind into overdrive.
Most of a writer's stories are flavored by experiences that they've had or stories they've read or heard. I've been busily thinking about the emotions and thoughts that people in that era must have experienced. The reasons that people from our history decided to put their lives on the line for what they believed. Why they were willing to stand up for something. These emotions and thoughts that people had as they marched and were beaten and arrested and more, what drove them?
It's important for a writer to make connections to their audience. Taking from these real-world experiences and filtering them through my writing ensures that people have some thread of connection, rather than just reading words on a page. The best stories are those that intertwine the human spirit with the words; these are the stories that you remember for years and go back to over and over again. Lord of the Rings showed me courage and adventure. The Cooper Kids series by Frank Peretti (the author who first inspired me to begin writing) showed me that trust in God didn't have to be shoehorned into a plot just because the writer was the Christian; rather, it was simply a truth that the characters believed. The challenge for myself is to capture feelings like these in my writing.
By the time that this year is over, I hope to be able to say that with confidence. To reach that goal, I will continue to read and write and experience the world around me and the history that I am a part of. You never know; maybe the words that I use will make people think the way that my colleagues words made me think.
"Be passionate and move forward with gusto every single hour of every single day until you reach your goal." - Ava DuVernay
Friday, January 13, 2017
New Year, Old Memories
What a week, what a week, what a week!
My brain is struggling, so it's a short post this week.
By Tuesday my fellow teachers and I were all exhausted.
Wednesday one of my students (5th grade!) drew an inappropriate picture in class.
Thursday, one of my girl students was calling the other girls inappropriate names on the playground at recess.
This morning I overslept and was almost late to work.
I'm so tired.
There were a few bright spots. One of my special education students has talked to me more this week than he has for the whole year. A lady who is coming to formally observe me next week just stepped in to say hello to me, then went to my principal and told her how impressed she was with my teaching. And, after nearly a month of not being able to drive my car, I got it back.
I'll be honest though, I'm so looking forward to this long weekend.
On the writing side, it's been an interesting week. I managed to write something almost every day. Granted, sometimes it was only a sentence, but it's a good way to start the habit. My dear best friend has been my constant support, asking me daily if I've written anything.
Something else that made me really happy was the return of my daydreams. My best friend and siblings can tell you that most of my story ideas come from dreams; they came back in force last month. Now the day dreaming that allows me to flesh out my writing by thinking through characters, figuring out plot, and even figure out phrasing has returned. I'm not even sure when it started, but I caught myself doing it on the way to school this week.
It really feels like a confirmation for me. I set my goals this year based on just a feeling (more than likely a prodding from God), and now my mind is getting back together to reach those goals.
Even though it was a rough week, I'm starting to get excited for this year. Let's see what we can create, 2017
“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can."
– Arthur Ashe
My brain is struggling, so it's a short post this week.
By Tuesday my fellow teachers and I were all exhausted.
Wednesday one of my students (5th grade!) drew an inappropriate picture in class.
Thursday, one of my girl students was calling the other girls inappropriate names on the playground at recess.
This morning I overslept and was almost late to work.
I'm so tired.
There were a few bright spots. One of my special education students has talked to me more this week than he has for the whole year. A lady who is coming to formally observe me next week just stepped in to say hello to me, then went to my principal and told her how impressed she was with my teaching. And, after nearly a month of not being able to drive my car, I got it back.
I'll be honest though, I'm so looking forward to this long weekend.
On the writing side, it's been an interesting week. I managed to write something almost every day. Granted, sometimes it was only a sentence, but it's a good way to start the habit. My dear best friend has been my constant support, asking me daily if I've written anything.
Something else that made me really happy was the return of my daydreams. My best friend and siblings can tell you that most of my story ideas come from dreams; they came back in force last month. Now the day dreaming that allows me to flesh out my writing by thinking through characters, figuring out plot, and even figure out phrasing has returned. I'm not even sure when it started, but I caught myself doing it on the way to school this week.
It really feels like a confirmation for me. I set my goals this year based on just a feeling (more than likely a prodding from God), and now my mind is getting back together to reach those goals.
Even though it was a rough week, I'm starting to get excited for this year. Let's see what we can create, 2017
“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can."
– Arthur Ashe
Friday, January 6, 2017
...And the Beginning of 2017
Happy New Year, one and all!
This was the first year that I spent New Year's Eve not at church, not at a youth group gathering, but actually in Times Square in NYC! Let me be the first to tell you, that was a hot mess.
In case you ever plan on seeing the ball drop in the home of Broadway, I offer a few suggestions. First. if you actually want to see the ball, plan on being there for literally the entire day. A cop that we asked told us that people had been gathering since 6 a.m. on December 31st to get into Times Square. As the blocks fill up, they barricade off more and more blocks. Once you're in, you're in. You leave, you don't get back in.
My friends and I, anticipating this, made sandwiches and snacks and brought water in two separate backpacks for the six of us. The snag? Owing to all of the backpack bombings at public events, neither backpacks nor strollers were allowed inside of the barricades. Which left us with a dilemma. What were we going to do?
Per the officer's suggestion, we decided to find an avenue where we could at least see the fireworks and confetti that would be released at midnight. Luckily it was in the 30s outside, rather than the much colder temperatures that NYC can offer. So here we are, bundled up like eskimos with hats, scarves, and gloves, ready to face the New Year with good friends and an optimistic look towards the future.
Until most of the group decided to go to a party and view the fireworks from across the water, inside, instead of in the cold NYC streets.
But you know what? As my best friend said, it was an experience. I can say that I was in New York City to welcome in the New Year.
Now to get back to real life and teaching.
I'm not going to lie; even though we only had about a week and a half off of work, I enjoyed every minute of it. Not to say that I wouldn't enjoy more of it, but hey, take what you can get.
The grind of preparing students for state testing is about to begin. Not looking forward to that at all. In addition, you almost have to reprogram the kids to remind them about how to behave in your classroom; you'd be amazed at how quickly they forget.
But anyway.
I decided not to do resolutions this year. Every time that I set a "resolution" it never lasts. I think it's something to do with it seeming such a high standard and putting so much pressure on myself to accomplish it that I get tired of it. Quickly. Instead, I've decided to set myself a few personal goals for the year.
It's been years since I've completely finished a novel; 2009, to be exact (the year that I started college - that explains a lot!) I'm long overdue. But what with the classes and homework and theatre and singing and then teaching, time and focus was not something that I had in abundance. But now that the only thing that I'm doing is teaching, I can practice time management to allow myself time to be creative.
To that point, I've decided a few things.
First, I'm going to finish a novel this year. I need to get my mojo back, and the only way to do that is to get writing. I also plan to complete several short stories and get them published; that's a good way to let people see my writing and what I'm capable of. To that end, I'm making myself write a little every day. Even if it is just a sentence, or going back and editing earlier stuff in that story, I'm gonna do it. I don't yet have the luxury of writing being my full time job where I can start writing whenever and for however long that I want; that's the goal. I'm about to start my stretches. If you want something, you have to chase it. That's what I'm going to do.
Thankfully, I have a cheerleader who always has words of encouragement and support for my writing. My BFFFEE (Best Friend Forever and Ever) is constantly asking me about my writing and how things are going. She's not going to let me rest, and that's exactly what I need.
Time to chase my dream. What dream are you chasing?
“The only thing worse than starting something and failing … is not starting something.” – Seth Godin
This was the first year that I spent New Year's Eve not at church, not at a youth group gathering, but actually in Times Square in NYC! Let me be the first to tell you, that was a hot mess.
In case you ever plan on seeing the ball drop in the home of Broadway, I offer a few suggestions. First. if you actually want to see the ball, plan on being there for literally the entire day. A cop that we asked told us that people had been gathering since 6 a.m. on December 31st to get into Times Square. As the blocks fill up, they barricade off more and more blocks. Once you're in, you're in. You leave, you don't get back in.
My friends and I, anticipating this, made sandwiches and snacks and brought water in two separate backpacks for the six of us. The snag? Owing to all of the backpack bombings at public events, neither backpacks nor strollers were allowed inside of the barricades. Which left us with a dilemma. What were we going to do?
Per the officer's suggestion, we decided to find an avenue where we could at least see the fireworks and confetti that would be released at midnight. Luckily it was in the 30s outside, rather than the much colder temperatures that NYC can offer. So here we are, bundled up like eskimos with hats, scarves, and gloves, ready to face the New Year with good friends and an optimistic look towards the future.
Until most of the group decided to go to a party and view the fireworks from across the water, inside, instead of in the cold NYC streets.
But you know what? As my best friend said, it was an experience. I can say that I was in New York City to welcome in the New Year.
Now to get back to real life and teaching.
I'm not going to lie; even though we only had about a week and a half off of work, I enjoyed every minute of it. Not to say that I wouldn't enjoy more of it, but hey, take what you can get.
The grind of preparing students for state testing is about to begin. Not looking forward to that at all. In addition, you almost have to reprogram the kids to remind them about how to behave in your classroom; you'd be amazed at how quickly they forget.
But anyway.
I decided not to do resolutions this year. Every time that I set a "resolution" it never lasts. I think it's something to do with it seeming such a high standard and putting so much pressure on myself to accomplish it that I get tired of it. Quickly. Instead, I've decided to set myself a few personal goals for the year.
It's been years since I've completely finished a novel; 2009, to be exact (the year that I started college - that explains a lot!) I'm long overdue. But what with the classes and homework and theatre and singing and then teaching, time and focus was not something that I had in abundance. But now that the only thing that I'm doing is teaching, I can practice time management to allow myself time to be creative.
To that point, I've decided a few things.
First, I'm going to finish a novel this year. I need to get my mojo back, and the only way to do that is to get writing. I also plan to complete several short stories and get them published; that's a good way to let people see my writing and what I'm capable of. To that end, I'm making myself write a little every day. Even if it is just a sentence, or going back and editing earlier stuff in that story, I'm gonna do it. I don't yet have the luxury of writing being my full time job where I can start writing whenever and for however long that I want; that's the goal. I'm about to start my stretches. If you want something, you have to chase it. That's what I'm going to do.
Thankfully, I have a cheerleader who always has words of encouragement and support for my writing. My BFFFEE (Best Friend Forever and Ever) is constantly asking me about my writing and how things are going. She's not going to let me rest, and that's exactly what I need.
Time to chase my dream. What dream are you chasing?
“The only thing worse than starting something and failing … is not starting something.” – Seth Godin
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